You Can't Handle The Truth

If you shouted that at your screen as you read it, we can be friends!!

Seriously though, most of you can't. You say you love honesty, you say you are ready to hear the truth when you ask for it, but as soon as you do ... you wall up, get defensive, push back, and the egotistical side of your human nature invites itself to the party it was never invited to!

No one likes that kind of party crasher, and ... you are essentially 'cock blocking' yourself from the wisdom you seek by allowing that egotistical-ness be the part of you that shows up.

Is the truth comfortable? Nope!

Is it warm and fuzzy? Sometimes no!

Is it easy to swallow? Sometimes no!

Does it pander to your sensibilities? Not a chance!

Does it tell you what you want to hear? Rarely!

Does it give a shit about your offendedness or feelings? No!

The truth doesn't have to do any of those things. It's the truth! It isn't mean, unkind, spiteful, wicked, or purposely hurtful or cruel, it just is what it is.

If you show up and meet the truth with all your feelings and opinions and offendedness then you'll never learn and grow. You'll just sit there, shriveled up in your own ball of egoic rightness, and end up like a wizened shrew sucking lemons.

You know the facial expression I'm talking about ... pursed lips, half snarl, eyes like daggers, fury coursing so hard through your veins, that they are popping, as you begin to breathe a bit more shallow and fast, rage rising inside you at the actual effrontery of someone telling you the truth you asked for ... how very dare they! Grrrr

And all the while you allow yourself to stay in that state, you miss out on the truth you're pushing back against so hard because of your fear of actually being seen so fully that you might just have to change.

In the wise words of Elsa from Frozen, let it go!

When Jack Nicholson shouted those words from the witness stand in A Few Good Men, ‘YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH’ - it was a right of passage moment for all the ones who CAN handle the truth, and a confrontation issued to all the ones who can't!

Which one are you?

I can tell you categorically which one I am. No questions. I love the truth, give it to me, let me have it ... but you better be damn good at delivering that truth from a place of the cleanest and clear energy with none of your own bullshit and projections behind it because ... I will sniff that out in a millisecond.

Do I find it comfortable? Absolutely not. I don't know a man or woman on earth who is immediately open to hearing the truth right off the mark. Everyone will have a reaction to being told something directly, but it's how you move next, after that instant reaction, that tells me everything I need to know about who you are and how you be.

For me, I know my eyes flash like lightning, then ... I crack a smirk, then I take a deep breath, and then I go inside to see if it's the real truth for me for certain, and then ... I come back out and say ... yup ... that's it, BUGGER! Because now I know I have to look at something. Now I know I have to get to work either figuring out why something is how it is for me, and shifting it, or sometimes just shifting it. Sometimes the why isn’t even important.

When I meet someone who is as open to the truth as I am, it’s ‘like meeting like’, and openness meeting curiosity. Have you ever met someone like that? If you’ve met me then yes … you have. If you haven’t met me, but have someone else then let me know who they are so I can meet them too.

And here’s my finisher, very important, truth isn’t a way to make a dig at someone. It’s not pandering, ‘tact’ or ‘politeness’, it's not sanctimoniousness or a moment to condescend or patronise. It’s not your time to lord it over someone or gloat, none of those are the real truth, they are all your desire to speak your own wounding into existence over someone else. That’s you just being a dick!

The real truth … hits you right between the eyes, in the softest centre of your core, behind your mask, and covers your body in a blanket of ‘oh fuck’ and ‘thank God’ all at once. You often won’t recognise the ‘thank God’ part because the other part is a heck of a lot louder.

The real truth has a tone, it has a flavour and feeling, and when it’s delivered from one clean heart right to the other, it is one of the most powerFULL things there is.

When was the last time someone was that truthful with you? And … have you ever been that truthful with yourself? Because … the truth of the matter is this … if you have never been that truthful with yourself, if you can’t be, if you won’t be, then you will never be able to experience the genuine AWEsomeness of the moment someone is cleanly, purely and directly truthFULL to you.

So … get cracking! Go break yourself open and poke yourself with some curious questions about yourself. About who you are, why you are how you are, who made you this way? Why? What patterns you have? Where you hold yourself back? What conditioning you have? What statements you use about yourself that aren’t entirely true?

Crack it ALL open and see if you can handle the truth!

And if you can … welcome to the next level.

xoxo

Ciara

Editor in Chief - ALL IN MAGAZINE